I wish.............

My dream is to fly over the rainbow so high...


So high and far away from my currently very crappy, boring, torturous, energy-sapping, excuse of a life.............!!!

Security issues, but I'm safe

It's been a terrible week for me and my neighbours. Monday night robbers came into our compound with the aim of stealing our cars and I dont know what else. We have two houses in the compound, mine and landlady's, with two servant quarters which we sublet to two men, making five cars between the four of us. On this particular night, we all came home rather early which rarely happens and were actually asleep by the time the thugs came. It also happened to be the night our security guy had his off-day, whether this is a coincidence or not I cannot tell.

At around midnight, we heard a loud bang/thud on the gate like twice which is when we got up and went to the window to check what was going on. The neighbours directly opposite us also heard the noise and could see three men unlocking cars in the compound and one of them driving off in Gorgeous's car - a double cab, the same one they used to launch through the gate with to open it. We raised the alarm and so did our neighbours but of course we couldn't go out as we were not sure how armed these guys were. With the commotion and the screams from neighbours and the loud alarms going off, I suppose the guys panicked and in the rush to get away with the double cab which they had already manouvred out of the gate they unfortunately reversed right into another neighbours house and right through the concrete wall. Thankfully, nobody was in the room at the time so no injuries, phew! In a bigger panic by now, they shot in the air twice as they fled on foot to keep us from going out. Jesus! It was like a bad movie playing right infront of my eyes and I couldnt do a thing about it. That feeling of helplessness is numbing and scary. I have never been so scared. By this time we'd called the police so as soon as we thought it was safe to get out we all went to survey the damage and it's like the whole neighbourhood had come out, each eager to tell their story and get the scoop. Gorgeous and I were just numb, we just paced back and forth in between hugs. Needless to say the back of his car is totally damaged and so is the gate and the neighbours wall (and he wants to be compensated ASAP).
I was rudely reminded that we are in Africa when the police arrived two and a half hours later with a breakdown vehicle in tow as if we'd asked for one. I was so incensed I didnt say a single word to them because, really, of what help were they to me?
Today we are getting a new security company although it still doesnt give me much confidence as this incident has all the indications of an inside job. I shudder to think what would have happened if we'd come rather late and been accosted at the gate all on our own. Or if the car had knocked some people and injured them when it went into that wall. I guess it's all God and am extremely grateful to Him. Am really counting my blessings.

Yesterday morning Gorgeous had to travel out of town for two days and I could not sleep at all coz I was all alone. I kept hearing noises at the gate, outside my door, cars driving out and it's driving me crazy, the paranoia. At some point it was so bad so he called me on skype and we talked for an hour then I was able to sleep. Am not the kind of girl who's a sissy but this has really scared me. My landlady is being quite strong which helps as well and I'm also assuming they will not be in a hurry to return after the botched attempt.

So people there's the drama thats got me out of hiding. Am trying to be really cool and easy about it but I think about it all the time. That said, I've missed you all and I'm still following your blogs. On another personal note, am going through a crisis that has me a little down but I'm working on it and I'll bounce back soon. Its something to do with work, both here and my personal projects and also the financial faithfulness of people I had placed my trust on.

I wish you all well, and do keep safe!

Updates/ multitasking

Am still very very un-inspired and so not blogging, and this time it would be unfair of me to blame my current so-not-there moods on hard work. I lost my mojo (did I have one in the first place?). Or maybe my life is all of a sudden boring. Or am old. Or I need excitement, scratch that, life is exciting at the moment. Oh well, I'll keep praying to the blogger-god to bring back my psyke.

In the meantime, I've spent loads of time doing lots of stuff with my usual crowd (am a very loyal person, and also a creature of habit. If it works then I stick to it), work as usual but most importantly catching up on my fave cartoons which has inspired my current layout, I totally looooooove the Simpsons.

I've also been making loads of smoothies and juices from the pawpaws and mangoes which are now weighing heavily on the trees in my garden. Wow! Atleast am not adding weight from junk I would normally chow as I "vegg" infront of my looser-box

My equally bored very good friend "S" had this to ask me as we were watching a boring Tyler Perry the other day (yaani Tyler is letting me down sana!!), "Smurf, (what he calls me coz I have all smurf stickers on my fridge and around the house), If YOU women are so good at multi-tasking, how come you cant have a headache and sex at the same time?" Hmm, what does one have to do with the other? Personally, if am not feeling it I just tell you "live" its not happening coz enyewe when I want I want and typhoons, el nino, electricity rationing, high gas prices, etc will not keep mama from getting some!

So anyway ladies, and dudes, the next time you're mad at your man and dont wanna do it or are just not in the mood for it, si you find a better excuse please?........... And also weigh the benefits of doing the deed healthwise and mentally and spiritually before you pull that long face and turn your back on him, only fools dont change their minds.

I miss everyone here and I'll be back......xoxo

Size...

If size mattered, Dinasaurs would still be alive!

Just Random.....

If you argue with a dwarf, can he be the bigger man???
Height of trouble: a one handed man hanging from a tree and his butt is itchy...
Height of lazines..a guy lying on a gal, waiting for an earthquake to do the rest...
Height of sophistication: sucking on nipples with a straw...

You can clearly tell am bored, oh well, I tried....................

Updates

In between travelling, a work avalanche, re-organising my house, writting a proposal for the bank for a new pet project, I have been overwhelmed. Also life has been just so-so and I sort of couldnt get myself to blog. Am not entirely back yet, but I plan to be soon. The last few weeks have been quite trying and challenging on many, I barely just managed to keep my head up and see the glass as half full. I kept all sorts of wierd hours during which I stalked all my favourite bloggers that I love to read and ya'll didn't disappoint.

At work, several tenders were closing. Remember I had highlighted in a previous post that as S & M manager there's more pressure on me to deliver new projects to meet our target for the year. The work I've bid in the past two weeks has been considerable and I am praying and pushing hard to get these in hand and give our cash flow a much needed boost (and save my job in the process as well!!!). I hope that goes well.

Financially, we are now feeling the crunch and those of us in management have had to be more understanding of the situation. So far, August salaries remain unpaid, commissions backdated a few months also unpaid which is now impacting negatively on me (the construction for mum's house might have to stall if some of these monies are not paid). Am not happy about this. I had anticipated roofing before the El nino rains hit us, but on the other hand my employer has been supportive and I feel obligated to hold off a little longer. Oh well....

I will make a big announcement on my personal life soon, as soon as I make the big move, I think I may have worked out things sufficiently in my mind. I'm now praying for courage and strength to follow through on what needs to be done once and for all.

I'm glad to be in a much better mood and frame of mind this week. Must be the quiet weekend I just had and the visit to the spa on Saturday. Last week hell would have gladly spat me out for the mood I was in. Hormones I guess but I was an absolute terror. And funny thing is I knew it and tried as much as I could to be on best behaviour but the smallest thing would set me off and it'd be downhill from there. I now sort of get what pregnant women, and by pregnant women I mean our HR manager, go through. One feels like an absolute mess. Thankfully I am not pregnant, the Lord is merciful afterall.

Everything taken into consideration, I still feel quite blessed and I strive to give thanks as much and as often as I can, regardless of the goings on. I feel luckier than most.

I also had my debut sex shop experience on a brief visit to Nairobi, but that's a story for another post.

Wish you all a fabulous week ahead! And for those in cold Nairobi keep warm!!

Guinness Power

Am in a daze, fantasizing, remembering, smiling sheepishly.

The wonderful spare ribs I had at dinner last night, and "wishing" them and the rich wine rose wine that we shared between us, Gorgeous and I (yes I did drink!).
The way he looked deep in my eyes.
The way he reached for my hand across the table.
Rubbing my cheek and pinching my nose.
The laughter, the warmth, the utter comfort.
The Guinness he had later at our next stop just for the fun of it (apparently it makes you horny, it was an experiment).
The brandy he convinced me to take (also suspected to have aphrodisiac qualities).
The suggestive looks....
The warmth that spread all over my body on my second double....
The shameless animal sex we had....
In the car on our way home......
In my parking lot overlooking the landlady's kitchen with the garage lights shining on us and her cat's meauws spurring us on.
On the love seat...
On the 2 seater....
On the dining table....
Across the bed....
Sleep, deep sleep....
More "rabbiting" this morning.
Infront of dressing table, facing the mirror....
The kitchen....
The tingling pleasure....
The loss of control....
Aaaaahhhh...
Sleep, deep sleep...

Verdict: Guinness works, Wah, it works!! And so does Brandy! Rox leaving for work at the very late hour of 10am is proof enough.......bye now, gotta go, cant let that guinness power go to waste

A fab weekend darlings!

Busy Bee/Mchongowano....

So I'm having a totally busy week. In addition to catching up with all my new duties, am also handling the Corporate department as the HOD is off and we just realised I need to do another USD 6.5 Million if we are going to meet our target for this year, all in 4 months. My boss is kinder worried and now so am I. I need the big contracts fairy soonest. Besides that am remotely supervising the construction back home, somehow managing the hay business and I cant find my PIN for the company registration. Its a busy busy time. Thankfully Mchongowano (Creative Disses) with a good friend via text is what is keeping me sane.....sample this.........(btw am pretty good at it, growing up partly in Nairobi ensured that!!)

• Ati uko na mdomo kubwa hadi unaweza imba collabo peke yako (You have such a big mouth you could sing a collabo all on your own!)
• wewe ni mrough hadi ukiguza mouse comp inashow "new hardware detected" (You are so rough that when you touch the mouse your computer shows "new hardware detected")
• Ati phone yako imezeeka mpaka phonebook imeraruka (Your phone is so old till the phonebook is torn)
• Wewe ni mdark mpaka huwezangi kupata bright ideas! (You are so dark you cant even get bright ideas)
• Weni mshort mpaka skin yako kwa miguu ime pigwa turnup usiikanyange (You are so short that your skin has turn ups around your ankles so you dont step on it!)
• wewe, Mamako ni m-ugly hata lotion yake huitwa WHY BOTHER! (Your mamma is so ugly her lotion is called "WHY BOTHER!")
• Umezoea kuandika please call me mpaka wezi wakija kwenu wewe hu-dial *130*999# (You're so used to writting the free "please call me back" messages you even send them to the cops 911 when there's a burglary at your house)
• wewe ni mrefu mpaka skin yako ina ishia kwa magoti (You're so tall that your skin ends at the knees)
• Haya, na wewe una sex drive high mpaka una gear kwa rasa. (You have such a high sex drive that you have a gear in the ass)
• una kichwa kubwa hadi huwezi think twice una think 4 times. (You have such a big head that you cant think twice, you only think 4 times)
• Manzi yako amekonda huvaa 'always' na suspenders! (Your girl is so thin she holds her "always" with suspenders!)
• wee ni mnono hadi ukikalia novel zinakua short stories (You're so fat, when you sit on a novel it becomes a short story)
• ati wewe ni mjinga uliulizwa swali na mwalimu wenu akakushow support ur answer ukasema "answer heee answer aaaahhh"! (You're so foolish when asked by the teacher to support your answer you......ok this one cant make sense in english)
• wewe ni mdark hadi ID yako imeadikwa scrach to reveal....(You're so dark that your ID is written, "scratch to reveal")

and the list goes on and on, more during my next break whenever that is

..................Needless to say creativity is at an all time low, not much happening socially, and not enough time to post other interesting posts I've been planning to post here, which is why mchongowano (dissing) is my only source of comfort in my otherwise plain, boring life. Brings lots of fond memories of my childhood, awesome carefree days those were..........

Top 15 of what I dislike....atleast for today

Not in any order but loathed all the same! - Pardon me if I hit a nerve!!Sneak preview of my DARK SIDE

1. Kenyan politicians - Do I really need to explain this? I always say I dont care, but I do, I care. And it pisses me off to my very last nerve when I read the papers or watch news and there they are pulling the wool over our eyes on so many issues, if its not stealing maize its misusing community development funds, inciting and promoting tribal clashes, corruption, grabbing public land and property etc. Am sure we could all mention a reason we dislike this crop of people but I still need my sanity......

2. Uncalled for Rudeness - Uncalled for because I believe there is some rudeness which is necessary, you know when its the only way to get someone to get it? Or on one of those days? (we're all allowed to have those, just limit it to once in a month otherwise we'll have a name for you behind your back. Hint: Begins with a B and its not beauty)

3. Queaus - Who devised the queauing system? I hate it, and if I know anyone who works at the bank/institution where am supposed to queau I will call them up and fast track. The daggers on my back will not bore a hole, keep glaring! On the other hand, if I dont know anyone at the back, dont you dare jump the queau bitch! Dont you see all these other people have been queauing for eons?? (hypocrisy) which brings me to the next thing I hate:

4. Doudle Standards - Men go like Oh, if my chick cheats am leaving her, but I can play a game or two, you know for us men its different. Oh, look at that nasty hair, and you've got camel/horse hair on your head, Please dont make noise am studying/busy, but when your cell phone rings you holler like a tramp on crack. Who said the world revolves around you??

5. PMS on the wrong sex - it is such a bitch!!

6. Perpetual Complainers - get a life, you may realise its not so bad! or go hang in outer Mongolia!! also kindly warn me in advance the next time you want to rant about nothing and everything so I can get my ipod in time and save my ears the trouble

7. Child Malnutrition - I love kids and it saddens me that kids are dying of hunger and malnutrition in Kenya, especially because of no.1 above and their cohorts!! We owe so much to these innocent kids, donate a packet of Unga, anything, whenever you can...

8. Extreme Intolerance - I attribute this to ignorance. Intolerance be it of other peoples religious beliefs, political affiliations, way of life, sexual orientations, etc. We all have a right to live life in our own unique way and there is no specific formula on how to live. Tolerance is a virtue lots of people could do with. Especially irritating is such behaviour from suspect quarters,really, look at the log in your own eye first brother

9. Bad breath - really people, we should be past this by now. I work in an office full of engineers and its like UCU 101 was, "How to have a bad breath at 8am and maintain it throughout the day". Arrgghhh,....and a piece of unsocilited advice to a certain smelly someone who's trying to woo another someone in our office, Mints brotha, mints.........

10. The HR - She thinks we're all pregnant just cos she is, and is the face of number 2 above

11. Betrayal - I've experienced it so much, even from people I hold dear so I wonder why I still get shocked everytime it happens. I wish we were all like little babies, the kingdom of God will be open to those who are like babies, clean of heart, sincere, conscientious, loyal. If you lose all these, you need to re-examine your soul

12. Haters - Normally I love haters, I love the blunt daggers in their eyes that would not sharpen a pencil even under duress, their hateful looks, their thinly-veiled attempts at hiding their bitchyness, their looks of jealousy whenever I work hard and get my own, etc. Normally I ignore them till they fade away but today I cannot stand haters, be damned to hell, doomness to you all!! And may the fleas of a million camels breed on your collective crotches and may your hands be too short to scratch!!

13. Indecisiveness - Especially when said indecisiveness affects other people's work as well. We only have the here and now, procrastination through indecision is the worst waste of time. Make up your mind then go the full monty, if you fail atleast you get bonus marks for trying and some great experience. Do something now

14. Budgeting - Which is what am doing now and it sucks. Its the reason am writting a note and waiting for the 11th hour to submit it ie 10 am tomorrow, Lord have mercy

15. Identity Thieves - Imitation is the sincerest for of flattery but sometimes its a little disturbing. A little originality never hurt anyone.

Yeah, it is that kind of day. What makes you angry?

feel free to add to the list, if its annoying it belongs here

Pheeewww!! That was close.....

This was my post yesterday before my internet decided to PMS!! I still dont have all my emotions together but its definately a better day.....


One hour 20 minutes ago I took a pregancy test using those home-test Kits at Gorgeous's house, my first time ever.



30 seconds later I confirmed am not gonna be a mama soon.



The relief! Overwhelming relief! Am speechless. I dont have words and that is part of the problem.



I thought I'd be over the moon and jumping all over. Quite the opposite. I'm in some funny mood that I cant even explain. I want to be alone. I dont want to see him so I came back to the office to pretend to work. There is an overwhelming sadness in my heart and I couldnt be with him at that moment. Emotions are a bitch



Not that I wanted to be pregnant, Lord NO!! I just didnt want us to go through the mental torture we've been under the last few days, the pain, the uncertainty, the what ifs. I never want to feel so hopeless and out of control ever again.



Anyway let me get my thoughts together and try to put on a happy face. He's waiting for me outside the office coz I practically ran off after getting the results and he came to the office to look for me. He wants us to go for a relaxing swim at his house to cool off the pressure of the last few days and talk about this. I suspect he just wants to be supportive though he doesn't understand my moods. We argued last night too after he convinced me to take the test which I was too scared to do on my own so maybe he also wants to make up. I



Am happy. But I cant show it. Melancholy..................

Am Back!!!

Am back!!!! Woooohoooooooo!!!! Yeah, ok. So am excited. But I missed you guys and this blog and Dar, and my house, and my special pillow, and my friends, my bed, the fantastic Dar weather (Nairobi weather is pathetic to say the least!!!), my houseboy Casper (he makes the best Biriani and thinks am his daughter), Gorgeous, hmm, yeah Gorgeous, my job and colleagues, my wardrobe, the beach, etc. I just missed it all and I realised that despite all the complaining I do about Dar not equalling Nairobi and all that, enyewe I penda this place why lie!!!

Reality check: My inbox is bursting at the seams with unread mail which FYI I am so not psyked for. My mind has totally refused to get back from holiday mode. Jana was my first day back and I managed half day then just gave up!! My inbox and the pile on my desk are just depressing. Maybe I should move them to some hidden folder and bring them to my attention in small bits, huh?

Not to mention the serious backlog from all those blogs that I read. I think I'll be transnighting on ya'll kidogo kidogo, hihihiii, my week will be seriously packed!!

Anywho Nairobi rocked though had I stayed longer I'd have been extremely tempted to get a "human heater" owing to the terrible weather, it was damn cold. I did spend time with my mum who I'd totally missed and even went upcountry to visit my cucu (grandmother) after whom am named. It was lovely, the warmth that woman has could melt even Osama's ice cold heart. She's a darling.

I also did quite a lot of biashara which is not in my usual comfortable line. I just couldn't hack sitting in the house doing nothing for all that time especially after all my plans were thrown into disarray by my contractor (he pushed forward meetings to a crash program on my last week). I started cutting grass, packing it into bales and selling it directly from the farm to willing buyers. Its actually very interesting and lucrative I must say if you dont mind being subjected to gigantic mosquitos and dealing with semi-literate labourers somewhere deep in Ukambani (I leased the land from the EPZ after convincing them my idea was beneficial to them. As in I pay them and also clear for them their land, a service which they would normally pay for.). ......... This got me thinking about the kiangazi (famine) and the situation out there is not pretty. With the lack of rains, right now the hottest commodities to sell are water and animal feeds eg grass. I mean I'd get people coming for the grass in Athi river all the way from Mtito Andei. Aside from the livestock, People are hungry and the situation is not about to let up. The hungry faces you drive by in that part of the country are just heart-wrenching, the looks of despair and misery in their eyes is too sad. I dont know what can be done but we need to have better preparedness in the future as a nation. Come to think of it, what will happen in November when the El Nino rains come? Will it mean green and plush shambas (farms) or will our people be left homeless with nowhere to run to in the wake of floods and all that? Just a though.........

I also got into the first phase of constructing a house for my mum and Lawdavmercy!!! It it bloody expensive!! I watched my whole budget get reduced to nothing right infront of my eyes. Walalalalalaaa!! So now am reviewing contractors to find a more affordable but reliable and quality conscious one so everything can begin mid-month. I need a miracle or super bank-robbery skills!!! Winning the lottery would be nice too.......... Am however not letting it get me down, building my mum a house has always been a dream of mine and I remember promising her the same even back in primary school. Am glad I can be able to do this now, I owe it to God. Its not one of those big expenditures that I'd like to take into my marriage or long term relationship when it does come around, so I want to do away with it now. And I also want to do it on my own, it's better that way. Wish me luck, I need to cut all the grass I possibly can, lol.....

Last week was also spent in the lawyer's office trying to set up a company with my awesome friend and business partner (who I suspect has a crush on me - I like him a little too - another post altogether). We are both 25, share similar goals and dreams, have a serious drive and can get along 99% of the time. We both dream of retiring by 40 and setting up a charity so we reckoned we'd start making that mulla now if we're gonna accomplish this. We agreed on real estate, which we're both fascinated with, and are currently looking at some property on Mombasa Road which we'll develop with the help of a lending institution, logistics still ongoing. The plan is to do it part-time for an year first to test the waters while still having the benefit of being employed then venturing full-time depending on how this turns out. I am praying for this day and night and I hope we succeed and can help other young people in these trying times. And possibly drive that Range Rover before it becomes old news, sigh......

Coming back to Dar, am both sad and happy because a dear friend of mine is leaving Dar and re-locating to the UK. On the one hand am happy for her as she has been looking forward to this for quite some time and it presents better opportunities for her. On the other I am sad because I'd grown so fond of her and we'd become quite attached to each other. She's actually my only true girlfriend in Dar. The only lady friend that I can really share alot about myself with. My other girlfriends I just dont feel very close to, they are friends for the good times. During the hard times, my male friends usually come through for me, though they arent so many as well coz am a very private person. Anyway am doing my best to be happy for her and from tomorrow I have to plan a farewell party for her for Saturday. Everything happens for a reason and in different seasons, I guess its time for us to part. I hope the world will be kind to her out there coz she has been such a blessing to me. Now gotta move on before I get more soppy........

Tamaku thanks for sharing the restaurants albeit belatedly. I ended up taking my colleagues to Osteria Italian Restaurant along Lenana Road and it was well worth it. Next time I'll plan better and consult you in advance.

Mwistar, am totally enjoying African Accents........

Gotta get back to work now and give my employer value for his money, I feel a bit guilty for not having psyke so am forcing myself to focus.

Missed you all sana and wishing everyone a lovely week (Anengiyefa am sure you're having a brilliant one with M, xoxo). Remember to keep the hope alive, keep believing, keep dreaming and keep loving, dont let life pass you by otherwise. xoxo

Nairobi updates.......

Nairobi is f@#*&n cold! Uuuwiiii!! If I had balls they'd have retreated all the way to my stomach right now. Damn!! The weather is one of the reasons I love Dar.

Luckily am done with training as of 15 minutes ago and I can now bring out all those warm and fuzzy clothes I couldn't wear at the training and also sleep in tomorrow.

Missed my fellow bloggers loads and just had to check in!

Anyway I have to go meet an old old friend and am so excited. We have those enduring friendships that just last long even though we do not talk every day or even every month. He knows we're tight and I appreciate his friendship. I love that about our friendship. When we meet we talk about all these things happening in our lives and I always leave with a feeling of lightness in my heart. I hope he does too.....

Later I'll take my Dar colleagues out for dinner on the town though I have no clue where exactly. I seem to have lost touch with Nairobi, sometimes I feel like a stranger here. All my friends have moved on and I've also grown in certain respects. But I digress, hmmm, where to go for dinner and drinks? Tamaku should be on my speed dial since he knows all these fascinating places.....


Anywho wishing ya'll a lovely week till am here next....

Anengiyefa, you are still in my prayers......

Happy

Aki today I am so happy. So so happy!! Even the sky looks just a little but brighter!! I'm sure its sickening to all those people around me that I'm showering with optimism especially given the chaos in our office today! I love this day. Just. Sijui kwanini. And FYI nothing extra-ordinary has happened to me, No - I didn't get those Christian Loboutin sling backs that are just sinfully hot, I just am happy. Period. I am oozing this peace and goodwill to all men that extends to everyone, even my creepy pushy boss (the one who stole my commissions)!

I woke up in the morning and chose to be happy and am trying to maintain it even as am buried in loads of work with no hope of leaving anytime before am gray and bent over!

Am not saying happiness is that easy or instant to achieve but sometimes many of us chose to allow circumstances we have no control over to make us miserable and dampen our days. Well not me today, I'm working on what I can and leaving the rest to God. It's that simple. And I'll strive to remind myself of that little fact when it all becomes to much to handle

p/s: dont take me too seriously though, my optimism and cheery look might be connected to the fact that am coming home to see my mummy for two weeks from Sunday. lol, muchos excitosis!!

Acceptance.....

Plagiarized from a friend's online journal. It rang true and I wish I could believe most of it with conviction that I am not perfect, but I am special and unique and worthy.

Daily Acceptance Prayer

Author Unknown

I accept myself completely.
I accept my strengths and my weaknesses,
my gifts and my shortcomings,
my good points and my faults.

I accept myself completely as a human being.
I accept that I am here to learn and grow, and
I accept that I am learning and growing.
I accept the personality I’ve developed, and
I accept my power to heal and change.

I accept myself without condition or reservation.
I accept that the core of my being is goodness and
that my essence is love, and
I accept that I sometimes forget that.

I accept myself completely, and in this acceptance
I find an ever-deepening inner strength.
From this place of strength, I accept my life fully and
I open to the lessons it offers me today.

I accept that within my mind are both fear and love, and
I accept my power to choose which I will experience as real.
I recognize that I experience only the results of my own choices.

I accept the times that I choose fear
as part of my learning and healing process, and
I accept that I have the potential and power
in any moment to choose love instead.

I accept mistakes as a part of growth,
so I am always willing to forgive myself and
give myself another chance.

I accept that my life is the expression of my thought, and
I commit myself to aligning my thoughts
more and more each day with the Thought of Love.
I accept that I am an expression of this Love.
Love’s hands and voice and heart on earth.

I accept my own life as a blessing and a gift.
My heart is open to receive, and I am deeply grateful.
May I always share the gifts that I receive
fully, freely, and with joy.